Tuesday, September 28, 2010

I too have come home in a bad mood

Not a G&T, obviously, but still delish
I tend to come from work extremely grouchy. People who don't me well are always surprised when they first see this wrath, because I have a very sweet and well, normal attitude most of the time.

But commuting gets the best of me. I come home and violently throw tupperware into the sink, and slam the closet door after taking off my shoes, and get so fired up my whole body starts to itch. It's not long before I say, "We are MOVING!!! To the middle of nowhere!"
Luckily, Peter is usually there to hand off a gin and tonic before running for cover. I think he and George Bilgere's wife would have a lot to talk about.

George Bilgere

When Odysseus finally does get home
he is understandably upset about the suitors,
who have been mooching off his wife for twenty years,
drinking his wine, eating his mutton, etc.

In a similar situation today he would seek legal counsel.
But those were different times. With the help
of his son Telemachus he slaughters roughly
one hundred and ten suitors
and quite a number of young ladies,
although in view of their behavior
I use the term loosely. Rivers of blood
course across the palace floor.

I too have come home in a bad mood.
Yesterday, for instance, after the department meeting,
when I ended up losing my choice parking spot
behind the library to the new provost.

I slammed the door. I threw down my book bag
in this particular way I have perfected over the years
that lets my wife understand
the contempt I have for my enemies,
which is prodigious. And then with great skill
she built a gin and tonic
that would have pleased the very gods,
and with epic patience she listened
as I told her of my wrath, and of what I intended to do
to so-and-so, and also to what's-his-name.
And then there was another gin and tonic
and presently my wrath abated and was forgotten,
and peace came to reign once more
in the great halls and courtyards of my house.


  1. Love it! What a good husband :) The poem's fantastic, of course, made better only by the fact that we can listen to it read in GK's incomparable voice. Hope the rest of the week goes well, and if not, that the G&T's keep coming!

  2. I'm glad you liked that one! I'm not super familiar with the writer, but I've become a new fan.

  3. Laura: glad to know I'm not the only grouchy commuter!


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